Years ago by some fickle miracle I was able to land a hostess job at a Chinese restaurant in Kerrville, Texas. I showed up to work my first night wearing the required white shirt and black skirt. The manager looked at me and said, “I thought you were blonde.” I told him, “No. I am not blonde.” Later I heard him talking to some random fuck. “I thought she was blonde. As it turns out, she has black hair. And she’s not bubbly. She’s too quiet.”

No blonde hair? No bubble personality? No hostess job for you! Too quiet black hair bitch!

Yeah, I was fired three days later.